Bryan H. Shelly remembered in Costa Rica

The Nofsinger family has just returned from a trip to Costa Rica. There they spent several days with Martha and Henry Miller. They took some of Bryan's ashes, and, as he wished, scattered them in the ocean. They shared these thoughts and photos with Kim and Mark, Ian and Todd. In turn, they are sharing them with us.

Thank you to all for continuing to embrace us all as we celebrate and grieve Bryan's life and death.





Hi Mark, Kim, Ian and Todd,

Early this morning before the sun came up I awoke to the sound of squawking parrots and the stillness of early morning. The quiet was especially welcome after on and off heavy rainstorms during the night. I remembered that exactly one year ago we gathered with you for the memorial service of Bryan at the Marcellus High School. And now we find ourselves in Puerto Viejo, Costa Rica with the Nofsingers, including Gary's brother Dave and wife Dara and Henry and Martha.

After breakfast we gathered in our courtyard with Bryan's ashes and began the walk down the steep hill, past the soccer field, past the elementary school, down the busy street, taking turns carrying Bryan. I thought of all the ways in which we didn't carry Bryan when he most needed us so it was especially comforting to think that we could carry his ashes on this last leg of his journey from Marcellus to the land of Martha's birth, down the winding mountain, through the rain forest by van, plane, bus and taxi and finally by foot down to the edge of the sea.

We gathered in a circle and poured Bryan's ashes over our hands and sang a few lines of the song that we sang at Bryan's memorial service, "Here in This Place".

Here in this place new light is streaming,
now is the darkness vanished away.
See in this space our fears and our dreamings
brought here to you in the light of this day.

Gather us in the lost and forsaken.
Gather us in the blind and the lame.
Call to us now and we shall awaken,
we shall arise at the sound of your name.

...and then the second verse which begins...

We are the young, our lives are a mystery,
we are the old who yearn for your face....
we have been sung through all of history,
called to be light to the whole human race.....

After taking some quiet moments to toss ashes into the sea, Henry and Gary dug a hole by the edge of the water to bury the remainder and we remembered how much fun Bryan had playing in the sand in Pensacola and wanted to be completely covered by sand except for his head.

As we finished, we were overcome with emotion and took some time to settle ourselves and remember how much Bryan's life and spirit is still very much alive within us. We are forever changed by our fifteen years of knowing and loving him and are honored by your request to bring his remains here to Costa Rica. It gives us comfort to know that part of Bryan will remain here with Martha's ancestors and by the sea which he so enjoyed.









Thank you for allowing us to participate in this ritual as we continue to walk the journey with you towards healing and understanding.

With all our love,

Chris, Gary, Luke, Andrew, Ben, Rose, Henry and Martha

Completing 2010 in Love and Memory: Honoring Bryan

On Monday evening, December 27, lots of us gathered at the home of Kim Henrtizy and Mark Shelly, Ian and Todd, to remember Bryan Shelly. This was the one year anniversary of his death.



Kim and Mark prepared a warm home, lots of food, photos and posters and other memories of Bryan. The T-shirt quilts that had been worked on all last year were done. And the Christmas tree was lit.

Lots of young folks gathered in the basement, the older ones mostly upstairs. And each of us took a turn to write a memory of Bryan or attach a photo to milk jug candle holders outdoors.

Thanks, Kim, Mark, Ian and Todd for opening your lives, your love and your grief to all of us. We all miss Bryan. We have all learned a lot about depression, and how to hold each other up in all circumstances. May the new year be blessed with new life for all.

December 24: Blessed Christmas to All!

"To us a child is born,
to us a son is given."

We are knit once more into God's DNA
as we embody the old, old story
of Jesus becoming flesh and bone.

May you know the peace and power of "God with you"
on this day and tomorrow and in the year to come.

peace,
Nina for Florence Church of the Brethren Mennonite

December 23: O Emmanuel

O Emmanuel:

“O Emmanuel, king and lawgiver,
desire of the nations, Savior of all people,
come and set us free,
Lord our God.”

Isaiah had prophesied,
“The Lord himself will give you this sign:
the Virgin shall be with child, and bear a son,
and shall name him Emmanuel.” (7:14).

“Emmanuel” means “God is with us.”

The face of The Christ is always Emmanuel, God with Us.

And we are all Mary before God,
welcoming our full humanity
by agreeing to hold The Living Christ in our own cells.

Emmanuel, you are whispering
your invitation in my ear:
"Come dance!"
It is the eve of Christmas eve.
This is the day of innocence
and the gateway of New Birth.
You will need to knit this joy in your bones,
because humanity is the necessary and fleshy fabric
stretched between birth and death.
With Jesus you are swaddled.
Tomorrow, who knows, with him you may embrace
the winding cloth.

Today is always the Dance Between
of Life.

"Holy, holy, holy,"
it is all holy.

Let the Holy-Days begin again!

December 22: O Desire of Nations

O Rex Gentium:

“O King of all the nations,
the only joy of every human heart;
O Keystone of the mighty arch of humanity,
come and save the creature you fashioned from the dust.”

Isaiah had prophesied,
“For a child is born to us, a son is given us;
upon his shoulder dominion rests.
They name him Wonder-Counselor, God-Hero,
Father-Forever, Prince of Peace.” (9:5),

and
“He shall judge between the nations,
and impose terms on many peoples.
They shall beat their swords into plowshares
and their spears into pruning hooks;
one nation shall not raise the sword against another,
nor shall they train for war again.” (2:4)

In the face of The Christ we see the Desire of Nations.

"Where are the African women?"

I was in Asuncion, Paraguay for a women's gathering as part of Mennonite World Conference. The women from Latin America were our hostesses.

"Dé todos un abrazo."
"Give a hug to everyone," they said.

And like long lost friends, we were given crushingly warm embraces, one after another, all around the crowded room. Holy Spirit energy flared, faces lit from deep within.

"Where are the African women," I asked again.

I was eagerly waiting to meet the sister I had only known through a few phone calls and emails over a four year period. We had been paired to support one another as Sister-Link women theologians.

The African women had been invited her to Paraguay, to this women's gathering, to tell their story of organizing and supporting one another as gifted theological leaders. They were that morning, not too surprisingly, late.

"There they are. Sibusisiwe is right over there."

We found each other. We embraced. And floods of tears burst from both of us, beyond words. Only face to face recognition and repeated embraces could speak between us though we had a common English language.

What a well-spring of desire for this friendship, this meeting, I had! What a desire for this one heart-link around the globe. How that must be, in some deeply unrecognized way, be the desire of billions!

The hall echoed with songs and shouts of praise to the King of All, the Desire of Nations!

December 21: O Daystar

O Oriens:
“O Radiant Dawn, splendor of eternal light, sun of justice:
come, shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death.”

Isaiah had prophesied, “The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shown.” (9:1).

Dawn, face of The Christ.
In you we have faith always.
Though the sun may be obscured by darkness,
the gray shroud of northern Indiana in this season,
yet the light shifts, daily, from night into day.
Though the hours of the day wax and wane,
the seasons remain constant in their rotation.
And sometimes, for the early riser, there is glory!

On this day of Solstice: full moon, longest night, you hold promise.

"By the tender mercy of our God
the dawn from on high with rise upon us
to give light to those who sit in darkness
and the shadow of death
and to guide our feet into the way of peace."
Luke 1:78-79

December 20: O Key of David

O Clavis David:

“O Key of David, O royal Power of Israel controlling at your will the gate of Heaven: Come, break down the prison walls of death for those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death; and lead your captive people into freedom.”

Isaiah had prophesied, "I will place the Key of the House of David on His shoulder; when he opens, no one will shut, when he shuts, no one will open.” (22:22),

and “His dominion is vast and forever peaceful, from David’s throne, and over His kingdom, which he confirms and sustains by judgment and justice, both now and forever.” (9:6).

Key Wielder, you are a face of The Christ.

I see you breaking into prison today. I hear your keys rattling. They are not the rattle of death, though they have sounded so in the past. They are the rattle of a familiar, of the one who comes "home" to unlock the door, and I am not afraid. The door is opened by the friend who has been given the spare key to the house. No need to knock.

So what if such a one, a powerful one, a liberator, walked into prison today. Walked into the cells of my friends. Walked into "solitude" to bring a message of unimaginable freedom. Beyond the bars, that is where we all want to be.

But which are stronger, bars of steel or invisible bars that lock us into isolation while barraged by all manner of voices and bodies assailing our eyes and ears and souls without the permission of the intimate who has earned our key?

Jailer! Chaplain! Come in! In this lock down in my heart, sit awhile. Lock me in your embrace of confrontation and comfort. Show me the freedom of your safety.